Sure a few times I've found myself balls deep in a roll of fat instead of a pussy but you can't win em all and a woman is a woman. So I post an ad with a pic of me in my bathroom mirror with the little Zach (not that little!!) at full attention doing my best Brock Lesnar impression. I know I'm pretty hot and that all of the chicks are going to be sending me emails asking for my number. So I go and make myself a protein shake (never giving up on getting ripped!!) and come back and I mean I'm flooded with requests. I find one that is just crazy. Some dude got in some accident and his dick fell off or something (what the fuck!) and he can't have sex with his wife but he loves her an wants to get her some cock. He looked me over and thought the Zachman could do just the trick. So he gives me a link to his wife's profile on some site.
It makes sense because you can never be too careful what with craigslist killers and fifty cents on the loose. So I click the link and sign up..they want your credit card so they know you are old enough to view naked pics which means I'm going to see alllllll of this dude's wife without even having to go to their house! I get onto her profile and she is smoking hot and my dick is nice and hard thinking about all of the things I'm going to do to her. So then there is a new email address to contact her at as she knows I'm for real now and not who faking who I say I am. Smart, I bet she can go like a racehorse. So I shoot this new email address a quick message and include a few more money shots if you know what I mean and the bitch never gets back to me! I email her husband a few more times but he never gets back to me neither and it cost me 40 bucks to sign up for this website!
Love aint always free I guess! Even if it hurts!
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